Fearlessly Courageous
Desk of Dennis Piller
8 31 2026
Repentance and Forgiveness; What Does God Really Require?
A dear friend fielded this question to me about repentance and needing to repent every day or get kicked out of the kingdom. Let’s talk scripture today.
We talk a lot about forgiveness, but sometimes I wonder if we have made it too simple. We say, “Jesus died for your sins. Believe in Him and you will be saved.” And that is gloriously true. Salvation is by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. He died for our sins, was buried, and was raised again. But there is another word Jesus repeatedly used when He called people to Himself:
Repent.
Matthew 4:17 says, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” Mark 1:15 records Jesus saying, “Repent and believe in the gospel.” And after His resurrection, Jesus told His disciples in Luke 24:46-47 that repentance for the forgiveness of sins would be proclaimed to all nations.
So is repentance necessary? I believe the biblical answer is yes…but we need to understand what that means. Repentance is not something we add to Jesus’ finished work as though His sacrifice were insufficient. Repentance is the response of a heart that has truly encountered the grace of God. We don’t repent so that we can earn salvation. We repent because we have come to recognize our sin, acknowledge our guilt, and turn toward the One who can save us.
R.C. Sproul made an important distinction here. Repentance involves a change of mind and heart about our sin. We stop defending it, minimizing it, or pretending it isn’t really sin. We begin to see it as God sees it. There is a godly sorrow—not simply because we got caught or because our sin produced consequences, but because we recognize that we have violated God’s law and wounded our relationship with Him.
And yet, repentance doesn’t mean that every time I stumble, I have to wonder whether I am still God’s child. Justification and sanctification help us understand this. Justification is God’s declaration that those who trust in Christ are righteous because of Christ. Sanctification is the lifelong process of becoming more like Him. When I sin as a Christian, I don’t suddenly stop being God’s child. But my fellowship with Him can become strained.
Think about a family. When a child disobeys his father, he doesn’t stop being his father’s son. The relationship hasn’t disappeared, but something has come between them. Confession and repentance restore the closeness that disobedience disrupted. That is why 1 John 1:9 tells believers, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
God’s grace is bigger than our memory. We will forget sins. We will fail to recognize things we should. Our salvation cannot depend upon remembering and confessing every microscopic failure. Our hope is Christ. But a heart that belongs to Christ should increasingly become a heart that hates what God calls sin and desires to walk with Him.
Forgiveness Without Forgetting
And that brings me to forgiveness.
I have forgiven people who caused life-changing damage in my life. In some situations, there were lies, dishonesty, greed, and consequences that took years to play out. I forgave, but there was never genuine repentance on their part. There was no accountability. There was no ownership of what had happened.
And I eventually learned something that I think is incredibly important: forgiveness does not always mean restoration of the relationship.
I could forgive someone without inviting them back into my life. I could release the anger, resentment, bitterness, and desire for revenge without pretending that trust had been restored. I could pray that God would work in their life without praying for their destruction. I could refuse to carry hatred while still establishing boundaries to protect myself and the people God has entrusted to me.
There is a difference between forgiveness, trust, and reconciliation.
Forgiveness can be something I choose before the other person ever repents. I don’t have control over their heart. I can’t make them acknowledge what they did. But I can choose what I will allow their actions to produce inside of me.
Trust, however, is rebuilt through truth, consistency, accountability, and time.
And reconciliation involves two people. A relationship cannot be completely restored by one person alone when the other refuses to acknowledge what happened or continues the behavior.
That doesn’t give me permission to become bitter. It doesn’t give me permission to seek revenge. It doesn’t allow me to continually rehearse the offense in my mind and feed resentment. Jesus calls me to something higher.
But forgiveness doesn’t require me to call evil good.
That distinction matters because some people have been terribly hurt and then told, “If you really forgive, you have to let that person back into your life.” I don’t believe Scripture requires that. You can forgive someone and still have a boundary. You can love someone and still say, “You cannot have the same access to me that you once had.”
God Himself demonstrates both grace and truth.
He calls us to repentance because sin matters. He offers forgiveness because grace is greater than our sin. And when we come to Christ in genuine faith, we don’t come announcing that we have cleaned ourselves up enough to deserve Him. We come acknowledging that we cannot save ourselves.
That is the beauty of the gospel.
Jesus doesn’t say, “Make yourself worthy and then come to Me.” He says, in essence, turn from your sin, believe the gospel, and come home.
And perhaps that is what repentance really looks like.
Not perfection.
Not pretending.
Not earning.
Turning.
Turning away from defending my sin and toward God’s truth. Turning away from self-rule and toward surrender. Turning away from bitterness and toward grace. Turning away from revenge and toward forgiveness.
We were once estranged from God because of sin.
But Christ made the way home.
And if I have truly experienced that grace, how can I refuse to extend grace to someone else?
That doesn’t mean I ignore what happened. It doesn’t mean I remove every boundary. It doesn’t mean I restore every relationship to what it once was.
It means I refuse to let someone else’s sin become the sin I carry.
I can forgive without forgetting.
I can love without trusting blindly.
I can establish boundaries without becoming bitter.
And I can repent without living in fear that every failure has removed me from God’s family.
Because the gospel is not that I finally became good enough for God.
The gospel is that Jesus was good enough for me—and when I truly understand that grace, my heart begins to turn toward Him.
Maybe repentance and forgiveness are closer connected
than we sometimes realize.
Repentance says, “God, I was wrong. I need You.”
Forgiveness says, “What was done to me was wrong,
but I refuse to let it own me.”
Both require humility.
Both require grace.
And both ultimately point us back to the cross.
Before you go:
1. Is there an area of your life where God is asking you not simply to feel sorry, but to turn—to acknowledge your sin and move in a different direction?
2. Is there someone you need to forgive—not necessarily restore to the same place in your life, but release from the debt you have been carrying in your heart?
My prayer is that these devotionals don’t simply give you something to think about, but draw you into a deeper love for Jesus Christ and community.
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If you’d like to go even deeper, I’d love to invite you to join me beginning Tomorrow… Tuesday, September 1st, for my free six-week online course, Discovering Jesus. We’ll meet Tuesday evenings from 7:00–8:30 p.m. as we explore the foundational truths of our faith and, more importantly, deepen our relationship with Christ. You’re welcome to invite your spouse, family members, friends, or neighbors. I’ll provide all of the materials at no charge. Just let me know. . To join the video meeting, click this link: https://meet.google.com/zkb-dxcq-iau
Until next time, keep your eyes on Jesus…because He truly is the Treasure.
Jamal Roberts HEAL
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